Since this is "football season," I thought I would share something that I think will give you a good laugh.  However, in the laughter, you will find some well given points.

CHURCH FOOTBALL

Quarterback Sneak-Church  members  quietly  leaving during the invitation.

Draw Play-What  many  children  do  with  the bulletin during worship.

Half-time-The period between Sunday School and worship when many choose to leave.

Bench Warmer-Those who do not sing, pray, work, or apparently do anything but sit.

Backfield-in-Motion-Making a trip to the back (restroom or water fountain) during the service.

Staying in the Pocket-What happens to a lot money that should be given to the Lord's work.

Two-minute Warning-The point at which you realize the sermon is almost over and begin to gather up your children and belongings.

Instant Reply-The preacher loses his notes and falls back on last week's illustrations.

Sudden Death-What happens to the attention span of the congregation if the preacher goes "overtime."

End Run-Getting out of church quick, without speaking to any guest or fellow member.

Flex Defense-The  ability   to  allow   absolutely  nothing said during the sermon to affect your life.

Halfback Option-The   decision   of   50%   of  the congregation not to return for the evening service.

Blitz-The  rush for the restaurants following the closing prayer.